Poems & Jokes
The Face Up Production staff have been writing poems & Telling Jokes in support of Church events, Conferences & Festivals for many years and built up an impressive amount of material.
Instead of lying in a filing cabinet gathering dust we thought it would be better to offer some of the material to general release. In this way you could use it for your local fellowship, school or Christian event.
We therefore offer a few samples of our work and a free licence to use them for Kingdom work.
If you like what you read and would like to have more material then we can either write material to order, send a full collection or run workshops.
Poems
- A Rich Man - A short humorous look at wealth.
- Black Magic - A serious look at the slippery slope of Fortune Telling to the Occult.
- Looking - Reflection on how man looks for fulfilment.
- Men of God Please - A tongue in cheek review of how we choose leaders in the church.
- Super Christian Ted - Pride vs Service
- The Train - Short poem to urge commitment
- Holy Spirit - A poetic prayer to the Holy Spirit
Jokes
Adam & Eve
It wasn't good for Adam to be all by himself, so the Lord said to him. "Adam, I have a plan to make you a very happy. I'm going to give you a companion who will fulfil your needs & desires. She will be loving, beautiful, kind, loyal & faithful. She will make you feel wonderful every day of your life." Adam was stunned. "That sounds great!" "I'm glad you like the idea, but it doesn't come cheap. It will cost you an arm & a leg." Adam thought about this for a moment and said, "What will I get for just a rib?"
Notices:
- On Thursday at 5pm the New Mums club meet. Anyone wishing to become a New Mum please see the Pastoral Assistant after the service.
- The Low Self Esteem Support Group starts up again this Tues at 8pm. The churches back entrance will be opened for all those wishing to attend.
- The Church Ladies have another cast off clothing sale this Saturday. They will be displaying their wares in the church basement form 1pm.
Do try to make it for a look, as it's for a worthy cause. - During the absence of our minister last week we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon. from Sam Stokes.
For copies of his wonderful preaching please sign up at the back.
Childish Wisdom
When your Dad asks "Do I look stupid" don't answer him.
Never spit when you are on a roller coaster.
Show a bad school report to your Mum when she is on the phone.
Forget the cake go for the icing!
Remember the two places you're always welcome Gran's house & Church
Bob: My parents have dreadful memories.
Sam: Can't remember anything eh.
Bob: Oh no, that's the problem they do remember everything!
The Top 10 Christian Chat Up Lines
- I know I don’t have a chance, but I just wanted to hear an angel talk.
- You know Jesus? Hey, so do I!
- Is it a sin that you stole my heart?
- The good book says, “Give drink to the thirsty & food to the hungry” so how about dinner & a bottle or wine?
- Good Christians don’t shake hands, good Christians hug!
- You look cold. Remember Ecclesiastes 4:11 “If two lie together they will keep warm.”
- You don’t have an accountability partner? Me neither!
- Nice Bracelet. WWJD - “Who would Jesus Date?”
- (Ladies) Excuse me, I believe one of your ribs belongs to me.
- The good book says “Love your neighbour” and I live next door!